lost in a hole somewhere between here and -

Model: Bianca
IG: @bianca.eye
NJ.

Before,
life can give death
a chance to reach me
and before,
I can do anymore damage
to myself or this world -
let my heart find whatever
that it may in search of.

Always feel like I'm caught in a dream, like a purgatory and everything - good or bad - feels the same.
It's like I'm forever sleeping even in waking life. It's like part of my soul disappeared, or maybe it's always been missing, I can't remember anymore.
I've been stuck in the middle of one long wave with no break in sight.

Lost somewhere in a hole; these nightmares, they're speaking to me in tongues. I'm riding on the wave watching the sky turn to fire. Asking myself, "do I want to make it out of here to see the light?" I'm just not sure if I'm up to being saved, because hell - it feels like home.

I've been getting these visits in the night and I've been speaking to the dead, they've been keeping me from completely unraveling. They've been reminding me that I still have more time left in a world that keeps throwing me away.
I'm ready to feel all of this.

It's in the places that we fear the most,
where we truly find out who we are.

That our darkness becomes our light.

me vs. who i am vs. who i want to be.

A small self portrait series.
Charlotte, NC.

I am my wishes.
I am my dreams.
I am my good days.
I am my bad days, too.
I am all of my fears.
I am my deepest regrets.
I am always lost inside
of my head and that's
okay.

It can all feel so unfortunate,
but remember,
sometimes -
the blessings are hidden
in starting over again.
And -
what's one more,
after a thousand times before? 

wishes on empty promises.

There's a time and place; if I knew any better, I'd be able to catch it before it slipped by.

She kept taking her chances on falling stars, making wishes with eyes closed.

I never made it.

She kept wishing.

Model: Adena Alexis
NJ.

I've already killed tomorrow.

Model: Mandee
Manhattan, NYC

In my head, I've already killed tomorrow. And, I know that it's all just in my head. But still, the days slip by before I can even notice. They slip right on by me and well, I don't give anything a good chance anymore.

Oh, what this life does to us. And oh, the secrets that every single one of us holds. Can you look back into your reflection these days or are you dodging yourself at every turn? Which side of the coin do you stand on? 
Oh, the things we've seen and done, raise your glass high and make peace to the things better off forgotten.